Engagement season- it’s the period of time between Thanksgiving and Valentine’s Day when most couples go from being boyfriend-girlfriend to lovey-dovey fiances. You would think this time of year- which is already full of cheer thanks to Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years- would be extra cheerful with the news of our friends and family members getting engaged, but it seems like the total opposite to me.
For the past month, and the upcoming month I can only assume, I’ve been seeing tons of tweets, Facebook posts and even viral photos of people whining about others getting engaged during “engagement season”. Tweets such as “UGH another girl from high school got engaged, while I can’t even remember the name of the guy I met last night” or “Engaged at 25? I’d rather not give up my life, thanks!” are popping up everywhere and starting to annoy me.
First of all, those who are complaining should be happy for others who are getting engaged. If you are a human being who generally cannot be happy for others, then that says a lot about you as a person. Secondly, getting engaged is not the end of your life, youth or happiness, contrary to what some nasty people say.
Getting engaged isn’t a race. The first to get engaged doesn’t win a prize. It isn’t something to throw in other’s faces (but at the same time, you should 100% be happy and post it on Facebook and tell the world). It doesn’t make you better or worse than anyone else.
I hope to someday get engaged. I would hope that my friends and peers would be happy for me, support me and voice their warm thoughts to myself and my boyfriend. But I’m actually worried- and almost prepared- for a huge backlash simply based on what I’ve seen, heard and experienced in the past 3 years since graduating college. It’s sad to admit that I know there will be friends of ours who will say mean things behind our backs- whether it’s because they are jealous, single, in a relationship and waiting to get engaged… whatever the case may be. I have tons of single friends who are 100% supportive and awesome and love spending time with my boyfriend and I. But it’s clear that not everyone is like this.
Now before you start to yell at me, I get that there are a variety of circumstances that would warrant these type of responses. If your best friend ditched you to marry her cheating and violent fiance, I can understand you being annoyed and upset. If that girl from college is posting 5 photos an hour of her ring and un-manicured nails in different positions, then I can understand as well. But for all other general circumstances, what is so wrong with your peers getting engaged and letting the world know? Does their happiness really affect your life so much that you have to broadcast some passive-aggressive message about it?
It’s hard for me to really put my finger on what is starting this phenomenon. Is it that single women are increasingly insecure and just can’t deal with the fact that others are finding “the one” while they are sobbing over The Notebook at home? Is it because we as a generation feel the need to “one-up” everyone else and the fact that someone else is engaged and we’re not ruins that plan? Do you not believe in marriage and feel the need to force that upon everyone else? Please, enlighten me.